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im trying to make a new creation..

trying to draw like usual..

but somehow, i feel like.. i wanna do it, but i dont wanna do it..

it feels more like.. im losing something in drawing..

im losing.. mmm.. u know.. originality? *sorry, bad english* n confidence..

feels like i keep drawing with someone else's shadow behind me..

makes me follow the same pattern as that person does while drawing..

but it reminds me of something...

in Kamen Rider Kiva, the hero [Kiva/Wataru] is a violin maker, but often to feels like his creations are failures.. his dad was a violin maker as well.. and his dad made a finest-ever-made violin called "The Bloody Rose".. one day he (Wataru) met someone who was an expert in making violin.. and that person said.....

Expert: "you shouldn't make something like this" *holding The Bloody Rose*

Wataru: "what do you mean?"

Expert: "you should make your own violin. something only you can make"

it makes me think..

and makes me realize..

i should make something only i can make..

but..

how..??